you walk into a café. you have 8 minutes before class. but you won’t stay awake without caffeine. when the barista calls the nickname that only baristas call you by, you grab your drink. lid. stirrer. milk. ignore the sugar. a vibration in your coat pocket. you have a new email.
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[[find an empty seat and stay in the café to get some work done|table]]
[[leave the café and go home|apartment]]you look around. there’s a table for two with no one there. there’s also a table for two with someone in one of the chairs. the jacket looks familiar. so does the bald spot with the yellow glare of the bare lightbulbs hanging from the ceiling. you walk towards that yellow glint. you reach out your hand. an inch from his shoulder a face whips around. he opens his mouth.
[[you cut him off before he can remind you where you’ve met before|ask]]
[[you put your finger to your pursed lips. shh. don’t say a word.|grofskins]]you get back to your apartment but you can’t find your keys. you know exactly where they are. in the pocket of the coat you wore yesterday.
[[text your roommate to let you in|roommate]]
[[go back to the cafe where there are public laptop chargers and get to work|table]]you ask if you can sit in the empty seat across from him. he nods and tosses back a friendly smile. you open up your computer. you steal micro glances at the face across from you. you can’t remember who this guy is. you can’t tell what he knows about you. the fourth time you dare to look at his face you find it staring back at you.
[[say you have to be somewhere. pack up and leave.|apartment]]
[[strike up some small talk to ease your anxiety.|anxious]]he pauses for a moment before chuckling and shaking his head in agreement. he understands that the café isn’t a safe place to talk. Grofskins can be anywhere. Anyone. You settle into the chair across from him and reach into your pocket. you pull out a cherry chapstick.
[[you tell the man quietly to grab one end of the chapstick|grab]]
[[you apply the chapstick to your lips|lips]]your roommate doesn't answer.
[[go back to café|table]]
[[break through the window|window]]he extends three fingers. they make contact with the cherry chapstick. immediately the two of you are sucked into the in between space. there is nothing to hold onto. there is no solid matter except your bodies. what you see surrounding you passes like a hundred dreams. each lasting a millisecond, but enduring years in your mind upon your visual encounters of them. they are memories, some from your past and some from other pasts. you know that what he sees is the same but for him. his memories. his dreams. suddenly you’re on your feet. the air is still again. hot. humid. dark. the smell of burning wood. the echo of your breath tells you you’re in a furniture-less space. you can hardly see.
[[you lie down|death]]
[[you call out to the man|call]]your lips are moist. congratulationsyour body presses against cold tile. the hard stone surface begins to shift beneath you. it starts to give. cushions you. dampness begins to seep through your pants. you begin to sink. the dimly lit room begins to rise from your vantage point. your peripheries are empty. black. the room is only a rectangle far above you now. a black form slides from the right side of this rectangle. you are in pitch darkness. you die.you say "hello?" no reply. you say it louder. you hear your voice from far away. a bright white light floods your vision. your eyelids rise.
morning.you climb up the fire escape. you stick your palms to the glass of your bedroom window and push up. thank god you never lock it. thank god you haven't been robbed. you're inside.
[[start doing homework|police]]
[[write about your anxiety in your diary|police]]
[[get a snack|police]]10 minutes pass. a knock on the door. Police. open up.
[[open the door|report]]
[[back out the window and down the fire escape|wanted]]the neighbors reported a robber climbing through the window. you show them that you are a resident of the property. they take you to the station for questioning anyway.
they put you in a cell. they leave. you wait. [[the sun sets.|call]]you run down the street. the street is coated in silver oil. you step into the oil. your feet sink. the oil is up to your knees. the oil is up to your belt.
[[swim]]" ________________ "
~~have we met before?~~
[[how have you been?|ASL]]
[[ugly weather`,` huh?|ignored]]he stares back blankly. he points to his ear and gives a slight shake of the head. he signs something brief. he is deaf.
[[smile and return to your computer|sleep]]
[[sign back|convo]]he looks at you blankly. shakes his head. goes back to whatever he was doing.
[[ok..you go back to your computer|sleep]]
[[throw a chair|chair]]your time at the café is dull. you drift into a [[slumber]]he starts to sign, "my name is T–" his hand knocks your drink onto your pants.
apologetically, he hands you a napkin. you begin to wipe your pants. you notice writing all over the [[napkin|ink markings on the napkin]]. you look back up. the man is gone.the barista calls the police.
[[you run before they get there.|wanted]]you dream of a street. the street has never heard of a café. you have never tasted caffeine. the street is coated in silver oil. you step into the oil. your feet sink. the oil is up to your knees. the oil is up to your belt.
[[wake up]]
[[swim]]the lower half of your body is so warm. you open your eyes. the café comes into focus. congratulations, you peed on yourself.
you stand up. the man holds out a napkin. you reach out to take it. you look into his eyes. he stands without breaking eye contact. you glance down. he has also peed on himself. he turns abruptly and walks out of the café.
you lower the napkin to your pants. when you look down you notice [[ink markings on the napkin]]you sink under the surface. the street is not made of tar. in fact`,` it does not exist. the oil is 20 feet deep. you swim to the bottom. [[you lie down at the bottom|death]]you unfold the napkin. in fine handwriting, you begin to read the [[story|Start]] written on the napkin: