Lord Crumpet happened to be very delighted this very day, as it was indeed the day that he had decided to/
[[-Organise a delightful tea party]]
[[-Go do a tour on his spaceship]]
[[-Go on a adventure through the rather enigmatic forest close to the pub]]
{(if: $Saves contains "Slot A")[
(link: "Load game")[(load-game:"Slot A")]
]}-Organise a delightful tea party
He had been planning to do this tea party for ages now! Everything had been magnificently prepared and all that was left to make was, of course, the tea. Lord Crumpet rose from his very comfy bed and proceeded to/
[[-Go eat a banana]]
[[-Look at the time]]
{(link:"Save game")[
(if:(save-game:"Slot A"))[
Game saved!
](else: )[
Sorry, I couldn't save your game.
]
]}-Pass the broom
You take hold of you majestic broom and move it swiftly across the room. In an unprecise motion, you accidentally break one of your legs and bleed to death on the cold floor.
**Ending 2**-Look at the time
It's currently 4 o'clock in the afternoon. The guests are set to arrive at 4:30. Enough time to/
[[-Pass the broom(You realise the floor is rather dirty. What has this butler been up to?)]]
[[-Prepare the tea]]
[[-Adjust your top hat]]
{(link:"Save game")[
(if:(save-game:"Slot A"))[
Game saved!
](else: )[
Sorry, I couldn't save your game.
]
]}**Tea Party**
An Interactive Tea-Drinking Simulation
By MrGreen
[[Start]]
-Go eat a banana
Ah yes, those delicious bananas that Sir Cheesesticks gave to you not so long ago after his expedition in Africa. You ready yourself to eat one of them when a dilemma suddently arises. Should you dip it in sugar or not?
[[-Absolutly]]
[[-Nah]]
{(link:"Save game")[
(if:(save-game:"Slot A"))[
Game saved!
](else: )[
Sorry, I couldn't save your game.
]
]}-Prepare the tea
You start to prepare the tea while simultaneously thinking of the mysterious whereabouts of your butler. After a good chunk of time, banging starts to be heard from the entrance door.
[[-Call your butler to open it]]
[[-Open it]]
[[-Go take a poopy]]
{(link:"Save game")[
(if:(save-game:"Slot A"))[
Game saved!
](else: )[
Sorry, I couldn't save your game.
]
]}-Open it
Why, it would appear to be your good friend Sir Cheesesticks, followed by Mister Cake, Miss Green, Lady Earl, Sir Muffin, Miss Black and ... Bob. You don't remember inviting that guy. Oh well, the more the merrier, you suppose. It really is a strange thing that they all arrived at the same time, you think to yourself, and show them the way to the garden, where the party shall be hosted. You decide to talk with them for a while before bringing the tea, to get some of their news.
[[-Talk to Sir Muffin]]
[[-Talk to Miss Green]]
[[-Talk to Bob]]
[[-Talk to Miss Black]]
{(link:"Save game")[
(if:(save-game:"Slot A"))[
Game saved!
](else: )[
Sorry, I couldn't save your game.
]
]}-Talk to Bob
Bob doesn't seem to be very interested in talking with you. How rude of him! you think to yourself. You decide however to observe him for a little while. He seems to be oddly interested by your carpet(Yes, you do happen to have a carpet in your garden, and it's only because you're not able to remove it from the ground), for some reason. You choose not to give it too much attention.
[[-Actually no, that seems like a very peculiar thing to do.]]
[[-Talk to Miss Green.]]
[[-Talk to Miss Black.]]
[[-Insist on talking with Bob]]
[[-Join Bob in his peculiar staring activities]]
[[-Talk to Sir Muffin.]]
[[Time for Tea]]
{(link:"Save game")[
(if:(save-game:"Slot A"))[
Game saved!
](else: )[
Sorry, I couldn't save your game.
]
]}You call your butler.
[[?]]
-Adjust your top hat
And that of course you do.
[[-Look at the time.]]
{(link:"Save game")[
(if:(save-game:"Slot A"))[
Game saved!
](else: )[
Sorry, I couldn't save your game.
]
]}-Look at the time
It's currently 4:01 in the afternoon. The guests are set to arrive at 4:30. Enough time to/
[[-Pass the broom(You realise the floor is rather dirty. What has this butler been up to?)]]
[[-Prepare the tea]]
{(link:"Save game")[
(if:(save-game:"Slot A"))[
Game saved!
](else: )[
Sorry, I couldn't save your game.
]
]}-Call your butler to open it
He doesn't respond.
[[-Call him again]]
[[-Open it yourself]]
{(link:"Save game")[
(if:(save-game:"Slot A"))[
Game saved!
](else: )[
Sorry, I couldn't save your game.
]
]}-Call him again
He still doesn't respond.
[[-Proceed to call him a third time]]
[[-Open it yourself]]
{(link:"Save game")[
(if:(save-game:"Slot A"))[
Game saved!
](else: )[
Sorry, I couldn't save your game.
]
]}-Open it yourself
Why, it would appear to be your good friend Sir Cheesesticks, followed by Mister Cake, Miss Green, Lady Earl, Sir Muffin, Miss Black and ... Bob. You don't remember inviting that guy. Oh well, the more the merrier, you suppose. It really is a strange thing that they all arrived at the same time, you think to yourself, and show them the way to the garden, where the party shall be hosted. You decide to talk with them for a while before bringing the tea, to get some of their news.
[[-Talk to Sir Muffin]]
[[-Talk to Miss Green]]
[[-Talk to Bob]]
[[-Talk to Miss Black]]
{(link:"Save game")[
(if:(save-game:"Slot A"))[
Game saved!
](else: )[
Sorry, I couldn't save your game.
]
]}
-Proceed to call him a third time
Nothing happens.
[[-Call him until he comes]]
[[-Open the bloddy door yourself]]
{(link:"Save game")[
(if:(save-game:"Slot A"))[
Game saved!
](else: )[
Sorry, I couldn't save your game.
]
]}-Open the bloddy door yourself
Why, it would appear to be your good friend Sir Cheesesticks, followed by Mister Cake, Miss Green, Lady Earl, Sir Muffin, Miss Black and ... Bob. You don't remember inviting that guy. Oh well, the more the merrier, you suppose. It really is a strange thing that they all arrived at the same time, you think to yourself, and show them the way to the garden, where the party shall be hosted. You decide to talk with them for a while before bringing the tea, to get some of their news.
[[-Talk to Sir Muffin]]
[[-Talk to Miss Green]]
[[-Talk to Bob]]
[[-Talk to Miss Black]]
{(link:"Save game")[
(if:(save-game:"Slot A"))[
Game saved!
](else: )[
Sorry, I couldn't save your game.
]
]}
-Call him until he comes
He doesn't come.
[[-For Christ't sake, open the bloddy door yourself!]]
{(link:"Save game")[
(if:(save-game:"Slot A"))[
Game saved!
](else: )[
Sorry, I couldn't save your game.
]
]}-For Christ't sake, open the bloddy door yourself!
Why, it would appear to be your good friend Sir Cheesesticks, followed by Mister Cake, Miss Green, Lady Earl, Sir Muffin, Miss Black and ... Bob. You don't remember inviting that guy. Oh well, the more the merrier, you suppose. It really is a strange thing that they all arrived at the same time, you think to yourself, and show them the way to the garden, where the party shall be hosted. You decide to talk with them for a while before bringing the tea, to get some of their news.
[[-Talk to Sir Muffin]]
[[-Talk to Miss Green]]
[[-Talk to Bob]]
[[-Talk to Miss Black]]
{(link:"Save game")[
(if:(save-game:"Slot A"))[
Game saved!
](else: )[
Sorry, I couldn't save your game.
]
]}
-Go do a tour on his spaceship
You enter your spaceship. You had to demolish part of the house to get it in the garden. Oh well. It certainly was worth it.
[[-Go do a quick tour around the Galaxy]]
[[-Enter the spaceship's toilet]]
{(link:"Save game")[
(if:(save-game:"Slot A"))[
Game saved!
](else: )[
Sorry, I couldn't save your game.
]
]}'
{(link:"Save game")[
(if:(save-game:"Slot A"))[
Game saved!
](else: )[
Sorry, I couldn't save your game.
]
]}-Go do a quick tour around the Galaxy
**FUCK YEAH**
[[End of Demo]]**End of Demo**
**Insert Disc 1 to continue.**
~~~This forest has always bewildered you, ever since it appeared on top of the south side of the City. At fisrt, people tried to chop it down so that they could go back to their habitats, but the trees proved to be suprisingly strong, as if they where somehow made of solid rock. So other people made the next logical assumption and tried to mine the trees down.
[[Of course, that didn't do didly shit, because you can't mine a tree down]]
{(link:"Save game")[
(if:(save-game:"Slot A"))[
Game saved!
](else: )[
Sorry, I couldn't save your game.
]
]}-Enter the spaceship's toilet
The spaceship's toilet is big and stumptuous. It is located where your house's toilet would have been if only you had a bigger garden.
[[-Go take a poopy.]]
[[-Converse with your butler]]
{(link:"Save game")[
(if:(save-game:"Slot A"))[
Game saved!
](else: )[
Sorry, I couldn't save your game.
]
]}
-Go take a poopy
You ready your buttocks to take a dump when a banana suddently appears in the shower.
[[End of Demo]]Maybe you should arm yourself before you decide to go in the depths of this awkwardly positioned forest. Rumor has it the trees are very efficient at killing people.
[[-Equip your tea set]]
[[-Equip your towel]]
[[-Equip your sword]]
{(link:"Save game")[
(if:(save-game:"Slot A"))[
Game saved!
](else: )[
Sorry, I couldn't save your game.
]
]}-Equip your tea set
But which one?
[[-The American one]]
[[-The Chinese one]]
{(link:"Save game")[
(if:(save-game:"Slot A"))[
Game saved!
](else: )[
Sorry, I couldn't save your game.
]
]}-Equip your sword
You equip your sword. Now what?
[[-Proceed to the forest]]
[[-Proceed to the pub]]
{(link:"Save game")[
(if:(save-game:"Slot A"))[
Game saved!
](else: )[
Sorry, I couldn't save your game.
]
]}-Equip your towel
You equip your towel. Now what?
[[-Proceed to the forest]]
[[-Proceed to the pub]]
{(link:"Save game")[
(if:(save-game:"Slot A"))[
Game saved!
](else: )[
Sorry, I couldn't save your game.
]
]}
-The Chinese one
You equip your Chinese tea set. Now what?
[[-Proceed to the forest]]
[[-Proceed to the pub]]
{(link:"Save game")[
(if:(save-game:"Slot A"))[
Game saved!
](else: )[
Sorry, I couldn't save your game.
]
]}-The American one
You equip your American tea set. It smells like wet tea and treason for some reason.
[[-Proceed to the forest]]
[[-Proceed to the pub]]
{(link:"Save game")[
(if:(save-game:"Slot A"))[
Game saved!
](else: )[
Sorry, I couldn't save your game.
]
]}-Proceed to the pub
After a short walk, you enter the pub. The bartender greets you and asks you if you want something.
[[-Some ale]]
[[-Some fish fingers]]
[[-Nothing for the moment, thanks]]
{(link:"Save game")[
(if:(save-game:"Slot A"))[
Game saved!
](else: )[
Sorry, I couldn't save your game.
]
]}-Proceed to the forest
You begin to march towards the forest, weapon in hand and hat on head.
[[End of Demo]]-Absolutly
As you dip the exquisite yellow fruit into the white sugar, it suddently transforms itself into a Banana God! The Banana God looks upon you with his majestic eyes.
[[-Pray for the Banana God]]
[[-Rebel against the Banana God]]
{(link:"Save game")[
(if:(save-game:"Slot A"))[
Game saved!
](else: )[
Sorry, I couldn't save your game.
]
]}-Nah
You consume the banana without sugar and lift your eyes upon the pendulum.
[[-Look at the time]]
{(link:"Save game")[
(if:(save-game:"Slot A"))[
Game saved!
](else: )[
Sorry, I couldn't save your game.
]
]}-Rebel against the Banana God
The Banana God strikes you with his Fruity Magic and you evaporate in a puff of incomprehension
**Ending 1**-Converse with your butler
Your butler signals you that the spaceship is ready for launch, as it always is. You answer him perfect. He nods.
[[-Go do a quick tour around the Galaxy]]
{(link:"Save game")[
(if:(save-game:"Slot A"))[
Game saved!
](else: )[
Sorry, I couldn't save your game.
]
]}-Some ale
The bartender gives you some ale and you move yourself to a table.
[[-Drink ale]]
{(link:"Save game")[
(if:(save-game:"Slot A"))[
Game saved!
](else: )[
Sorry, I couldn't save your game.
]
]}-Why yes, that would be lovely
You dip a fish finger in the custard and eat it. Delicious. You die a few seconds later due to custard poisoning.
**Ending 3**-Some fish fingers
A little bit of custard with that, sir?
[[-Why yes, that would be lovely]]
{(link:"Save game")[
(if:(save-game:"Slot A"))[
Game saved!
](else: )[
Sorry, I couldn't save your game.
]
]}-Nothing for the moment, thanks
You move yourself to a table and spot 2 of your friends in the crowd, Sir Cheesesticks and Mr.Sweets.
[[-Talk to Sir Cheesesticks]]
[[-Talk to Mr.Sweets]]
{(link:"Save game")[
(if:(save-game:"Slot A"))[
Game saved!
](else: )[
Sorry, I couldn't save your game.
]
]}-Talk to Sir Cheesesticks
Sir Cheesesticks seems delighted to see you. You both talk about the economical system and politics for a good while until you ask him if he wants to join you on a expedition inside the forest. He says yes, let me just grab my gun. You say of course. He grabs his gun and follows you as you both go towards the forest.
[[-And in time,]]
{(link:"Save game")[
(if:(save-game:"Slot A"))[
Game saved!
](else: )[
Sorry, I couldn't save your game.
]
]}-Talk to Mr.Sweets
Mr. Sweets tells you that he hasn't drank tea in weeks. You ask him why. He tells you he forgot how to do it after he fell from the stairs. You quickly expain to this poor man how to make tea. He thanks you and rapidly goes home.
[[-Talk to Sir Cheesesticks]]
{(link:"Save game")[
(if:(save-game:"Slot A"))[
Game saved!
](else: )[
Sorry, I couldn't save your game.
]
]}-Drink ale
You drink the pint of ale and start to feel a little confused.
[[-Bring me another one]]
{(link:"Save game")[
(if:(save-game:"Slot A"))[
Game saved!
](else: )[
Sorry, I couldn't save your game.
]
]}-Pray for the Banana God
You pray for His Curved Excellency. He rewards you with 2 bananas.
[[-Look at the time]]-Bring me another one
The bartender gives you another pint of ale.
[[-Drink it.]]
{(link:"Save game")[
(if:(save-game:"Slot A"))[
Game saved!
](else: )[
Sorry, I couldn't save your game.
]
]}-Drink it
You zone out.
[[-Wake up]]
{(link:"Save game")[
(if:(save-game:"Slot A"))[
Game saved!
](else: )[
Sorry, I couldn't save your game.
]
]}-Wake up
You wake up in a dark room, with only a bed and a chair around you. You touch your head and... yes! No one stole your hat while you where asleep.
[[End of Demo]]-And in time,
You stand in front of the forest, weapon in hand, hat on head and friend by your side.
[[End of Demo]]-Talk to Sir Muffin
Sir Muffin asks you if there are going to be mufffins on the menu. You say of course. He seems delighed.
[[-Talk to Miss Green.]]
[[-Talk to Bob]]
[[-Talk to Miss Black.]]
[[Time for Tea]]
{(link:"Save game")[
(if:(save-game:"Slot A"))[
Game saved!
](else: )[
Sorry, I couldn't save your game.
]
]}-Talk to Miss Green
Miss Green thanks you for inviting her to the party. People usually forget to invite her to parties.
[[-Talk to Miss Black.]]
[[-Talk to Bob]]
[[-Talk to Sir Muffin.]]
[[Time for Tea]]
{(link:"Save game")[
(if:(save-game:"Slot A"))[
Game saved!
](else: )[
Sorry, I couldn't save your game.
]
]}-Talk to Miss Black
You ask her how's the law stuff going. She tells you the law stuff is doing fine, she won the trial. You say oh that's marvelous. She says yes, the other guy was blind thought.
[[-Talk to Miss Green.]]
[[-Talk to Bob]]
[[-Talk to Sir Muffin.]]
[[Time for Tea]]
{(link:"Save game")[
(if:(save-game:"Slot A"))[
Game saved!
](else: )[
Sorry, I couldn't save your game.
]
]}-Go take a poopy
You ready your buttocks to take a dump when a portal suddently appears in the shower.
[[-Go throught the portal in the shower]]-Go throught the portal in the shower
You go throught the portal and appear in the bathroom.
[[End of Demo]]-Insist on talking with Bob
You don't have time to insist Bob to talk with you because the carpet suddently collapses.
[[-Fall]]
{(link:"Save game")[
(if:(save-game:"Slot A"))[
Game saved!
](else: )[
Sorry, I couldn't save your game.
]
]}-Actually no, that seems like a very peculiar thing to do.
You begin to question Bob on the reasons of his actions when suddently the carpet collapses.
[[-Fall]]
{(link:"Save game")[
(if:(save-game:"Slot A"))[
Game saved!
](else: )[
Sorry, I couldn't save your game.
]
]}-Join Bob in his peculiar staring activities
You join Bob in his peculiar staring activities. After a while, the carpet collapses.
[[-Fall]]
{(link:"Save game")[
(if:(save-game:"Slot A"))[
Game saved!
](else: )[
Sorry, I couldn't save your game.
]
]}-Talk to Miss Black
You don't have time to talk with Miss Black because the carpet suddently collapsed.
[[-Fall]]-Talk to Miss Green
You don't have time to talk with Miss Green because the carpet suddently collapsed.
[[-Fall]]
{(link:"Save game")[
(if:(save-game:"Slot A"))[
Game saved!
](else: )[
Sorry, I couldn't save your game.
]
]}-Talk to Sir Muffin
You don't have time to talk with Sir Muffin because the carpet suddently collapsed.
[[-Fall]]-Fall
You, along with all 8 of your guests and the table, are now laying inside a dark room beneath your garden.
[[End of Demo]]He doesn't answer.
[[You serve the bloddy tea yourself.]]You reach your hand to the teapot and start delivering the precious liquid in each of the guest's individual cups, [[very slowly.]]
The time comes, eventually
[[nice hat]]You thank Lady Earl for this pleasant comment and return to your tea drinking occupations
[[and so on]][[Oh my]]Oh my, said the totality of the guests as the quantum realm decided to make a horse appear in the living room [[and set it on fire.]]
The fire quickly spread to the wodden table and forced evertone to exit the habitat. Mr.Cake pronounced a few daring words regarding the hellish state of the situation, which promptly shocked Lady Earl.
[[End of Demo]]