you stare at her \n\n"do you know someone in there" you ask. its kind of the wrong thing to say \n\n"my grandfather, he lives there," \n\n"ah . . . . . . im sure he is ok" \n\nshe doesnt say anything but as more smoke billows, her nose scrunches \n\n[[hug her|Hug]] or [[go home|Okaeri]]

you don't remember falling asleep but you remember your dream and that is enough. it was a gross dream, one that involved babies, or something \n\nyou suppose you should [[get out of bed|Food]], but you could always [[sleep some more|End1]]

its your friend, Malcom, and he wants to hang out with you, at your place this time, because hes "damn tired of looking at his momma" you say ok but the only thing you have to eat is toaster strudels and cheerios \n\nhe offers to bring some soda and frozen pizza\n\n[[wait|AnswerDoor]]

you try to hug her, she shoves you onto the ground \ndirt gets in your hair \n\nyou dont know why but you tell her her grandpa is probably dead\nshe starts crying \n\nso do you

you leave those stupid cheerios behind and get up to go outside. the sirens get louder but it might be your "magical brain" doing its work again. either way the air outside is nice feeling, your body is always hot-feeling and sticky. you bet your brain is the same way \n\na fire truck drives down your street. why dont you [[follow it|Run]]? \n\n

you made the right choice by getting out of bed. not that there is a right choice but whatever \n\ntoaster strudels are good but for some reason the dough boy on the box is freaking you out, his eyes are boring into your inner fire. you close the freezer and grab the cheerios even though theyre gross \n\nyou pour a bowl and start eating without pouring any milk, you drank the milk yesterday and it was sour but you didn't toss it out\nyou can hear sirens, but it might just be you hallucinating again\n\nyou could [[go outside|Door]] or [[finish your fucking cheerios|Food2]]

you take a big swig of your drink and malcom looks at you intently. "we have to go to the fire site" \n\nyou sigh. "ok" when he looks at you with the Eyes, you have to go along with what he says \n\n[[go|Go]]

you sit on your bed when your Razor(TM) starts trembling on your bedside table\n\n[[answer it|Answer]] or [[ignore it|Ignore]]

it takes you a long time to finish those cheerios without milk, but eventually you do. youre proud of yourself because you dont eat very often anymore \n\n[[sleep more|Start]] or [[take a shower|Clean]]

you tell her you dont know and she says ok. shes got fear on her face and a tiny nose but very big eyes and you stare at her for a long time until a fireman tells you to back up back UP \nyou accidentally back into her, but you dont say sorry \n\n[[stare at her|Stare]]\n\n[[go home|Okaeri]]

you lean in and kiss him, awkwardly \n\nhe kisses you back \nyou dont know what to do \n\n[[drink|Drink]]

firetrucks\n

you go home and youre real sweaty \n\n[[shower, you nasty fuck|Shower]] \n

you say sorry and she hardly nods in acknowledgement \n\nshes kind of pretty\n\n[[stare|Stare]]

you ignore it and flop onto your bed. you cant remember if you take your medication. you suppose it doesnt matter and your eyes close \n

you try to take a hot shower but only cold water will come out. you want to blame your dad but he moved out over a month ago and doesnt have anything to do with you anymore \n\nthe cold shower is ok but you forget to shampoo your hair and go straight to the conditioner, but oh well, it doesnt matter, you have nowhere to be \n\nyou dry off and put on one of your mom's old shirts from when she was overweight so that itll cover half of your undies and you [[go into your room|Phone]]\n

you go home and the oven is all heated up, malcom puts the pizza in and sits down "that was kind of disappointing" \n\n"cops are scary" you say \n\nhe agrees and licks his lips \n\n"lets watch a movie" you say \n\nhe agrees\n\nyou two watch a movie, and you fall asleep, and its blissful, you really like malcom \nyou dream about him\nall of him

[[you sleep more|Start]], at least you think\n

you shower and its cold and you cry a lot, but you always cry a lot

youve always been a really fast runner and your mom said you had "chicken legs". youre really showing her now, aren't'cha \n\nthe firetruck is slowing down by the apartments on the outskirts of your neighborhood. you know youre not supposed to follow firetrucks or police or any of those other eggheads but here you are, envying them\n\nthe apartment is totally on fire. theres smoke. you can see it. smell it taste it sense it what-have-you-it, there it is\npeople from around the block are coming out of their houses and looking at you funny, youre sweating\n\na woman asks you "whats going on?" \n\n[["i dont know"|Know]] [["there's a fire"|Know2]]

you tell her theres a fire and she says ok. shes got fear on her face and a tiny nose but very big eyes and you stare at her for a long time until a fireman tells you to back up back UP \nyou accidentally back into her \n\n[["im sorry"|Apology]]

you wait for twenty-two minutes before he arrives and he asks if there was a fire somewhere down the road, because there were lots of police cars and even some news vans. you say you dont know and he shrugs \n\nhe puts the pizza in the oven even though you havent heated it up yet, you tell him this but he says "whatever" you tell him it bugs you and he says "ah" before removing the pizza and heating up the oven. malcom gets you, and he doesnt even ask why youre in your boxers you kind of like malcom, maybe \n\n[[turn on tv|TV]]

you stand back and just as you step back there is a large PHLOOF, the flames plume into the air \n\nmalcom grabs your arm "its not safe here..." \n"...?" \n"lets go back to your house, im sorry" \n\nyou pass a woman who has fear on her face and a tiny nose. shes kind of cute, but malcom is cuter\n\n[[return, slowly|Return]]

you pull back and he sighs. "ok, we probably shouldnt go, im sorry for tuggin you" \n\nyou tell him its ok and grab a soda. he brought your favorite kind of cola its the local market's off-brand\n\n"thanks" \n\n"its nothing" he says, and he stares at you for a while \n\n[[kiss malcom|Kiss]] or [[drink soda|Drink]]\n

you click on the tv that sits in your kitchen and malcom tells you to turn on the news channel \n\nlo and behold, there is the apartment building down your street, very orange and very black and very hot \n\n"shit, shit" malcom says "thats close."\n\nyou dont say anything \n\nmalcom grabs your arm \n[[resist|Resist]] or [[go along|Go]] \n

you get up and he and you run beside each other, it gives you a fuzzy feeling\n\nthe apartment is on fire and you reach it quickly, you and malcom used to be on track together, thats how you met\nyou can feel the heat on your face and there is a crowd and police officers shouting at everyone to PLEASE STAND BACK or to GO HOME, PLEASE\n\n[[go home|Return]] or [[stand back|Back]]

shibori