!!! PLEASE LET ME KNOW IF ANYTHING DOESN'T WORK !!!
You play as Cloudpaw, a skilled warrior apprentice in Riverclan, living her daily life. This is part 1 of possibly multiple :)
For anybody confused, Squirrelpaw is Cloudpaw's adopted sister, and Cloudpaw is the only survivor of a litter of 4 (the others were still born). As well as this, Cloudpaw is albino.
The sentences flow on, and makes it harder to read. Ex. "As your adopted sister, after being the only survivor of your litter, and her being found at a Gathering as a newborn, you've grown to love her." I just find that sentence is hard to understand. Could u split them into sentences?
I also don't like that the choices you make have absolutely no consequence. If you ignore Squirrelpaw, she doesn't give a crap when you hunt with her.
The storyline is sorta forced on you, ex. you can't choose to stay at camp when Squirrelpaw wants to go fishing.
Personalities are kind of forced onto you. You can't choose to hate Squirrelpaw, or refuse to hunt with her.
Anyway, that's all I can say about this. Overall the story is amazing, and I like that you put a decent amount of choices. Please remember this is my opinion, and I'd love to see more of this. I can't believe no-one's commented yet. (Btw I love the names!)
Fantasy
Comedy
Horror
Educational
Sci-Fi
Mystery
Puzzle
Simulation
Surreal
RPG
Slice of Life
Historical
Literature
Romance
Seasonal
Sandpit