super short, I didn't really like how it started off as darkfeather liking "you". I would like to get to know who he is, in case others haven't read warrior cats.
I think its pretty good but I agree, you could add more choices and more story to it. You could also give us a choice to live our/her life. Like maybe more toms to choose from or deputy/leader or maybe a loner. But I think it's great overall and at least it's finished. By the way, I'm making one of my own, its called warrior cats moon ray clan. I don't think you can find it just by searching sense it is a work in progress but, here is a link :) tell me what you think please and thanks. http://textadventures.co.uk/games/view/y0vydyz_yeotyn8ckpvo0w/warrior-cats-game-moonray-clan
When I first started to play it I said `yay at least a good game in this page!` but then on the fight with the badgers I decided to finish with my badger first and... well... at least you could do my death more realistic, please. I chosed the other ending (help Darkfeather) and that ending was OK until I realized that the badger I was fighting with just vanished in the air. Later, when I got to a walk with Darkfeather I told him `no, I dont want to be your mate` and I drowned. If I said yes, the ending was still boring. If you could update the endings a bit or do it more long I would give it a bigger rating.
It's a pretty good game, I would just like to suggest somethings.
1. Make more different and unique endings. The only real endings are to be with Darkfeather or die.
2. If the character is going to die, you should make it more realistic. In one end you are surprised by a badger and killed. Yet why would this badger kill you if you were able to fight two badgers near the nursery? In the next ending, you are with Darkfeather and he asks you to be his mate. If you say no, he leaves and you drown. There is no way a wave big enough to sweep a full-grown cat away would develop THAT quickly.
3. You also fail to follow the Chekhov's Gun principle and while not necessary, it helps your story to follow it. If you don't know, Chekhov's Gun means if something(like a gun) Is introduced into the plot, that thing has to be used in some way. (like said gun getting used in the next chapter).. You make it seem like Gingerpelt and Rainspeckle are going to be a problem by having Violetflame feel dread with them being there. Then, these two are never heard from again. You set up a problem with no payoff.
4. After the celebrate with your clan option, the paragraphs get really short. The paragraphs sound better when they are longer.
Overall an ok game, and you don't have to listen to any of this. I'm just trying to help.
I don't give a FRICK about Darkfeather. But oh no, you HAVE TO be mates with him. Atleast make multiple toms to be with, y'know! There's no other way to go than 'be mates with darkfeather' and it makes the game really shallow and mediocre. It's also not interesting at all. I'm sorry, but this game needs to just be restarted completely. It's like a fake cake; It looks nice, but when you bite into it it's horrible.
This game is good. It was fairly short though, and everything went by very fast. There was only one major event, and then the rest of the event so were only small pieces about Violetflame’s life. You forgot to expand further on the elder bush fight, it ends blankly without having an end like the nursery fight pathways.
The game description is very short. You could add things to it, such as some of Violetflame’s family and friends, some context, or foreshadowing for what is going to happen in the game.
The good ending is very abrupt. It isn’t where there is plain no end like some games, but it just speeds by. I hope this feedback helps for both users and you, Creeper Archer.
Fantasy
Comedy
Horror
Educational
Sci-Fi
Mystery
Puzzle
Simulation
Surreal
RPG
Slice of Life
Historical
Literature
Romance
Seasonal
Follow us on Facebook
Follow @TextAdv on Twitter