SivD1

Reviews by SivD1

08 Mar 2015
Though short, I appreciated you taking the time to make something like this; something out of the norm, and was educational. Having not heard of this incident during the Cold War, I found this to be an enjoyable and efficient way of doing so. Good work!
(4)

"You then hear a very loud scream.

"What the fuck was that?" Stephen asks.

"That was a scream!" You answer."

Sorry, I just had to post that, made me laugh pretty hard.

Anyways, review time. I see you have a story to tell, and I'm sure that the full episode will explore it deeply, but the demo didn't really cut it for me.

It got off to a bad start with the opening credits, to be honest. Though I don't see a problem with you doing them, I would rather you put them at the end, or possibly just make it one long line of text describing every credit. It kind of turns people off when they have to click continue over and over again (especially at the start!)

It's a demo, so I won't judge the amount of choices or the length. I'll be honest, Stephen seemed like kind of a dick for the time we've been with him. I don't mind having un-likeable characters in the series (especially in one such as The Walking Dead), but having a major character that you start off with (in this case, your brother), is a bit of an odd choice.

However, I didn't spot too many grammatical or spelling errors, so that's always a plus (though for the full version, I recommend going back and revising a bit). Also, the next time trailer was quite interesting, and seems that the full episode might hold some promise (whether all of the situations will actually happen, I will have to find out for myself).

Anyways, ok demo, but I'll check back when the whole thing's out. Good luck!
(3)

19 Dec 2014
Very good, I love this trilogy. Though I have to say, I think this was my least favourite to date.

It's odd, because it featured some of its most clever deductions, but also some of its silliest. I thought that bringing the chases back was a good addition, and some of your puzzles were very satisfying and made perfect sense. Though I thought Claire's character was a bit OTT, and could have been toned down a bit. Also, (spoilers here), I knew Quentin was the killer as soon as we first met him in the bar, so it kind of took me out of the experience as I said "Look! He's right there!"

Overall, I still enjoyed it. Great length, very little grammatical errors, and enjoyable throughout.
(4)

04 Nov 2014
I enjoyed this story more than your Breaking Bad one. It was a decent length, and had many characters, and the dialogue and writing seemed faithful to the source material. Also, I didn't find many grammar mistakes, so that's a plus.

The downside come to the story and interactivity of the adventure. The story was... rushed, to say the least. Also, I think that you might have wanted to have more interactivity (for example, when you choose who to kill, have us do things to actually get the guy), and possibly split the story in smaller chunks of paragraphs (which you did use this time).

All in all, I think that this is a step up from your previous work, and continue to encourage you along your way.
(3)

03 Nov 2014
My total deductive reasoning score was 78.9%! I saved all the girls!

I very much enjoyed this sequel, possibly more so than the original. I enjoyed the fact that the antagonist was someone you could either despise or feel sympathetic towards. It seemed that this one was more thrilling than the last, and the twists a bit more complex (which is good!). I did miss the Dynamic Reasoning points, but the story was intense and had an epic conclusion, so that's forgiven.

Hope you make more in the near future!
(5)

Review for Victorian Detective
03 Nov 2014
I am a Bloodhound (11 Detuctive Reasoning Points) and an Agile Athlete (4 Dynamic Action points. I didn't track down the Russian brothers. I caught the Shakespearean Bomber. I caught him alive.

I must say! This is remarkable! Not only was the case itself great (good length, clever, made sense, had action and crime-solving), but you threw me a curve with those points and choices at the end there! Also, the added artwork was appreciated (especially when you made a question out of it!). On to the sequel!
(5)

This story showed promise!

I'll get the bad out of the way first. It didn't seem like the story progressed very much (though I understand this is only the beginning, my first episode was similar). Also, the characters are pretty under-developed as of right now (though I'm sure that will be fixed later on). Also, some of the lines seemed a bit unnatural, and maybe a bit of an overuse of profanity.

Time for the good! It seems like you took your time detailing the story, and making it seem as realistic as possible. Also, I only found two grammar/spelling mistakes, so a free cookie for you! I also liked how it tied into the show/comics a bit there at the end.

All in all, like I said, this shows promise!
(3)

18 Oct 2014
Not as impressed as I was with the first. Let's start with the good, the writing is still realistic enough (that base was a reallllly nice place! Cake, MMM). I also liked Jay living through episode 1 (though it does make that ending irelavent).

You introduced a whole lot of characters in this one, and I don't know how I feel about it, will they all just die randomly? Also, my prediction was correct, your choices in part 1 didn't matter in this one. I also didn't find the story to go anywhere, but I'm sure that part 3 will be better though out.

Anyways, I still enjoyed it, on to part 3!
(3)

18 Oct 2014
Good stuff! I enjoyed the story, and it was a good length. I also liked how some of the writing would be appropriate in which an 11th grader would speak, like "this is really bad".

My negatives are pretty normal, some grammar and spelling mistakes here and ther, but not too many. The only BIG problem I had was the lack of a sense that your choices mattered. Will the supplies we get matter? I especially didn't enjoy that you gave us a choice of which house to go to, but it would be Jay's no matter what.

Anyway, good stuff. On to Parts 2 and 3!
(4)

12 Sep 2014
It was ok. I would love for you to use actual paragraphs instead of making one paragraph for each section. Also, the choices weren't very meaningful. Plus, just a tip, don't do a "If you did this click here" thing, it takes you out of the experience. Besides the cliffhanger, I don't really see the point of it being in the Breaking Bad universe (as much as I love the show, I don't really see any point in making my own story in said universe). Speaking of story, I didn't find it all that interesting. It was kind of random and dragged on at times (though I thought the length was good, the time itself could have been better used) Better luck with Episode 2!
(2)

Review for Karen
01 Sep 2014
Enjoyed what I played. It is a little short (though you said that you made it that way on purpose), but it's good from what I've read. NOTE: Broken link on "go with Elijah" and you spelt "did" instead of "died".
(4)

Review for N7
24 Aug 2014
Enjoyed what I played so far. I'm currently working on a "The Walking Dead" text adventure, I'm planning on doing a Mass Effect styled text adventure afterwards. Can't wait for updates!
(4)


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